HERE ARE SOME JOKES (or close to a joke) I HOPE THEY DON"T OFFEND ANYBODY - THEY ARE ALL MEAN"T IN A GOOD FASHION!!
- What's another name for a gay guys scrotum?
- Mudflaps!
- Old guy goes into the optometrist's office. He opens the door and says to the receptionist, "I think I need my eyes checked."
- She says, "You're not kidding. This is the Ladies Room."
- How many animals can you fit into a pair of pantyhose?
- 10 little piggies, 2 calves, 1 ass, 1 beaver... ... and a fish no one can find
- What's the difference between a bitch and a whore ?
- A whore sleeps with everybody at the party, and a bitch...
- ..sleeps with everyone at the party except for you
- What did the cannibal do after he dumped his girlfriend ?
- He wiped his ass.
- What's the difference between 'white fairy tales' and 'black fairy tales' ?
- White fairy tales start, "Once upon a time...". Black fairy tales start...
- .. "Yo, you motherfuckers ain't gonna believe this shit..."
- How do you make 'Holy Water' ?
- Boil the hell out of it !
- How many orgasms does the average woman have during sex ?
- Who cares, as long as you get yours !
- What do you call a Jewish homo ?
- a He-Blew !!!
- "Conscience" is what hurts when everything else feels so good.
- Which sexual position produces the ugliest children ?
- Ask your mother !!
- What do you need for Instant Easter?
- Two boards and a Jew.
- The guy walks in and says, "Doc, what's with the nun?"
- The doctor says, "Oh, I just told her she's pregnant."
- The guy says, "The nun's pregnant?"
- The doctor says, "No. But it certainly cured her hiccups."
- A young lady is in the hospital for an operation.
- She says, "Doc, how long after my operation will I have to wait until I can have sex again?" He says, "You know, Miss, you're the first person who ever asked me that before a tonsillectomy."
Why was JFK, Jr. flying to the Vineyard?- He wanted to crash his cousin's wedding.
- Why didn't JFK, Jr. take a shower before he left for the Vineyard?
- He said he'd wash up on shore.
- What do JFK, Jr and penguins have in common?
- Both are cute ... but neither one can fly.
- What's the Kennedy's flying motto?
- Your luggage will arrive before you do.
- What did JFK, Jr. miss most about Martha's Vineyard?
- The runway.
- What was JFK Jr's final sexual experience?
- Going down on Gay Head.
- What will they name the movie about movie JFK, Jr.?
- Three funerals and a wedding.
- Why is and JFK, Jr. worse than Ted Kennedy?
- Ted drowns his women only one at a time.
A guy is walking up to the
doctor's office when a nun comes running out screaming and crying.